as ever

i fill the quiet

other's words crowding out

on my own

under a shared roof

hungover and its not quite

regret

the error loops wearing their grooves

deeper into me

I've sunk as far

away from the light 

sometimes seeing better

in these shadows 

artificial contrasts

no longer distracted and 

this is where the work happens

too often asking

to what end

glitching through life

knowing truth 

and denying 

the choices I make 

a denial of the inner

thoughts I can't share with

anyone

Except. 

these empty pages

a living will 

against my own I continue

the hardest way forward 

stop

and cut that desire path

right angles and

efficient

boy, time is running out

you're the same as in the memories

all of this is you

has been you

will be you

what do you do with it

what's left

interrogate the declaration 

there's no need for 

punctuation 

life has never fit so neatly

into any form

a constant micro

ebb and flow

even when the pieces of the whole 

cease

how many countless other pieces

oscillating forever

parkinsonian tremolo

echoing across years

amplitude and frequency

tinnitus or static from sources

elsewhere 

doesn't matter

the story is the same

only difference is

what perspective does

this distance from 

what came before

that was me

there, then

as is this, now