what have i

is this already done
and dusted a patina covering
what began so shiny and 
new love is always perfect love

lasts as long 
as breath continues filling
a balloon bursting inside
my chest alternating between
fluttering and an 
ache of the first morning’s dawn

at the time so many
our small steps and tentatively 
believing the unbelievable

a Universe aligning 
the light pouring through the most
perfectly straight lines 

an infinity between the 
deepest blood red of 
histories unknown, but sympathetic 

a harmony of hurt
suddenly salved under that
cautious plague sky

Crisp blue and perfect 
we’ve been here before

you and he and she and i 
and each i, in each 
memories live forever

to be forgotten is 
an impossible past 
improbably but precisely
could have been no other

Life led but this 
determination an incalculable product of
choices &
chance;

Is there a difference?

Between you&i
there is no space for (Us)
realizing
the creature in the mirror
is the same as when we 
close your eyes and imagine

it’s the easiest thing in the world
apart we lived the alternate version 
of the other
the same

i spelled backwards is still i 

bearing, carrying the
black and blue and red of our own 
souls straining against this
life, offering nothing
more than
choices